Challenging the Societal Pressure to Get Married

depression




Have you ever wondered why there's so much pressure to get married, even though it's not a requirement?

It's like a weight that suddenly falls upon you the moment you hit 25 and enter the realm of adulthood. The quarter-life crisis hits you like a tidal wave, and you find yourself grappling with responsibilities you never thought much about before.

You're expected to secure a good job, earn a certain amount of money, and, of course, find a life partner. But let's be honest, getting married doesn't hold the same importance as building a successful career or creating a better life for yourself. Yet, those around you seem to believe that hitting a certain age automatically means it's time to settle down and start a family.

I've personally experienced this firsthand. I've been with my husband for 12 years, including our time as girlfriend and boyfriend. When I was single, I constantly faced relentless questioning about when I would settle down. Now that I'm in a committed relationship, I understand why people are curious about it, but I, too, had my own uncertainties. I had no clue when my partner would pop the question, and I eagerly anticipated that moment. Social gatherings became a breeding ground for constant pressure and interrogations.

But here's the thing: regardless of whether that proposal comes when expected or not, the lingering feeling of needing to get married takes a toll on your mental and emotional well-being. It becomes an additional burden amidst all the other significant responsibilities and pressures life throws at you.

Debunking Popular Myths Surrounding Introverts

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Open your eyes and observe diverse human interactions. Notice how many people make countless assumptions about introverts. I have to be honest with you. Most of these assumptions are unpleasant and negative. Introverts are portrayed by the media as aloof, snob, weird, or odd individuals. They carry these assumptions without justification. I, for one, am tired of this narrow-minded way of thinking. 

 In behalf of my fellow introverts, here is a PSA. May it shed a glistening light on the subject at hand.

 MYTH #1: INTROVERTS DO NOT LIKE OTHER PEOPLE.

 There is an abundance of stereotypes posed on introverts. For starters, they are perceived to be socially anxious and judgmental. This may sound shocking to you, but introverts like other people. They simply favor the quality over the quantity of relationships. Introverts prefer cultivating a small group of trusted friends rather than exploring the possibilities of having a larger network of acquaintances. 

 Picture a company Christmas party where all employees are mandated to come. You will most likely catch an introvert from the sidelines. The extroverted boss may interpret this as not wanting to join in the fun, but observation is enjoyable for an introvert. Some people may misinterpret the act of observation as the act of judgment. 

She Is Braver Than She Thinks: A CBT Experiment On Social Anxiety

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If you cannot brace the overwhelming attention given by other people, do your best to fit into the ideal. Let us face it! We live in a society that is governed by a set of standards. This is why we employ dress code at workplaces and guest etiquette at weddings. Most of us have a preconceived notion that conforming with the majority leads to wider acceptance and to less judgement. But, is this always the case?

 GETTING DOWN TO BUSINESS

 Last month, I had the privilege to partake in a Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) whereby a subject was tasked to address certain thoughts with the aid of Exposure therapy. Exposure therapy occurs when there is a gradual interaction between the person and the feared object or situation. This method works well with people who suffer from Phobia. 

 For the purpose of anonymity, the subject's name will be replaced by a fictional character from the Harry Potter series. Hermione is weighed down by her Social Anxiety. Social Anxiety (or Social Phobia) refers to the extreme fear of being judged by others in social situations. This is why the objective of the experiment is to disprove her assumptions that she attracts attention due to the presence of negative traits (i.e., physical appearance and other internal factors).

 The premise is simple! She wore an over-the-top outfit while interacting with people in different types of places. Picture a woman with a face mask, black eye-shadow, dark clothing, and blue hair. Will you stop and stare? The mere thought of eyes gazing in her direction made Hermione's heart pound.

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