How To Interact With Needy Individuals (Including Yourself)
July 21, 2018Click the title to read more. Visit Ask Anna Page to find out how to ask!
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Before we get down to business, I must define what neediness and being needy really is.
Neediness is considered as a condition of indigence. People with low socioeconomic status feel this condition. On the other hand, a needy person is insecure and codependent. He or she usually uses tactics to gain approval, attention, or both.
As with everything, there are two sides of the story. There are those who deal with the needy individuals and those who deal with their emotional conflicts. Continue reading on to know more!
DEALING WITH YOUR PERSONAL WOES
#1: TAKE A BREATHER
Go and press the pause button! You deserve a short break to escape from the suffocating grasp of neediness. Recognize that irrational fear is the problem. It is the root of your insecurity and co-dependence.
What must you do next? You must clear your thoughts. Use positive stress management tools such as mindful meditation or breathing exercises. Doing so may just reduce your impulse to act out of neediness.
#2: IDENTIFY THE SOURCE
With an uncluttered mind, it is time to uncover the sources of your irrational fear. What are your unmet desires? Do you ask to be heard by your spouse or to be recognized by your boss? Noticing patterns of negative emotions can help you with your investigation. Negative emotions include jealousy, anger, frustration, vengefulness, and sadness.
#3: GET SOCIALLY CONNECTED
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Get your needs met not by depending on someone, but by valuing the relationship. This healthy version of dependency is more active and direct. Begin by delivering your requests in a concise manner. Do not just blindly reach for the stars! "Connectedness" is about acknowledging the needs of both parties.
#4: LEARN FROM EXPERIENCE
A significant part of maturity comes from experiential learning. You may find a good friend or a professional life coach that will help you through your emotional journey. Nonetheless, learning entails accepting your situation and developing new and healthy ways to overcome it.
DEALING WITH THE NEEDY PEOPLE AROUND YOU
Whether you interact with needy individuals out of guilt or obligation, our feelings toward these people are often a reflection of how we tackle our own needs. It is complicated!
#1: SET THE BOUNDARIES
You may feel that someone is nauseatingly needy when you perceive yourself as an inappropriate target. So, state your boundaries. How close can that person get to you? If you do not want a relationship at all, say so. Do not string someone along romantically or make him or her believe that you are friends.
#2: CREATE NECESSARY SPACE
The next step is to politely limit your interactions with the needy individual. Gradually distance yourself to reaffirm your desire for less contact. For instance, it is confusing to state that you are not friends when you continue inviting a certain individual for social events and personal gatherings.
#3: LEARN TO SAY "NO"
One of the simplest ways to free yourself from a needy person is to say "No!". When the situation calls for it, do not be afraid to encourage the person to perform the task on his or her own. Do you want to be the go-to person that he or she may come to in events of distress? Think about that!
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#4: ACCEPT THE SITUATION
When your emotional needs do not align with someone else's needs or comfort level then, a friction can exist.
You must accept that. Learn to anticipate awkward encounters or uncomfortable conversations to maintain your sanity.
Sources: 1 & 2
Best of luck! :)
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4 comments
Honestly I do not know if I need to see a psychiatrist..psychologist...grief counselor...medical Dr., or my pastor to figure out how to deal with the problems that I finally figured out are making me physically ill! How ridiculous is that!!
ReplyDeleteMay you get the professional or spiritual help that you seek. I wish you the best.
DeleteI read your blog but I do not have the idea that what you write about. So I think i have to read it once more for proper understanding.
ReplyDeleteIt revolves around the tendency to be overly needy towards another person. It can be problematic! :) Thanks for reading.
DeleteWhat is on your mind? I will get back to you as soon as possible! Thank you. :)