Crying Is Not a Sign of Weakness

catharsis

Click the title to read more. Visit Ask Anna Page to find out how to ask! Follow MP on Socials too.

“Those who do not weep, do not see.” Victor Hugo, Les Misérables

I have always been someone who cries easily. Whether I am hurt, joyful, or overwhelmed by beauty, my instinct is to let the tears fall, and I always feel lighter afterward.

One childhood memory stands out. My father once told me, “If I could give you my strong heart, I would.” Even as a child, I never believed strength meant hiding your tears. To me, crying has always been an honest expression of what it means to be human.

I cried while watching Wicked 2, especially during “For Good,” because it captured the beauty of connection. I cried when I failed my first thesis defense, and I cried again when I finally passed. The second time, the tears felt like a rainbow after a long storm. That moment reminded me that resilience comes from releasing, not suppressing.

Why Do We Love?

emotions

Click the title to read more. Visit Ask Anna Page to find out how to ask!


Image Credits: unsplash.com
As negativity infiltrate social media and as unfortunate events make noise, it takes conscious effort to highlight the goodness in the world. Hence, I steered my focus on love. Why do we love? 

 Love is addicting, beautiful, heart-breaking, and exciting! Often, these descriptions are felt at the same time. Why do we choose to put ourselves inside this emotional roller-coaster? Does love make our lives meaningful or does it help us to escape from existential loneliness? If romantic love serves a purpose, what is it exactly? 

 Not one law has been put to place regarding the reason why human beings fall in love. Nonetheless, here are some interesting theories. 

 #1: LOVE IS AN ARTISTIC EXPRESSION

 I have gathered the opinions of my Interior Designer and Photographer friends to elaborate the reason why love exists. To them, love is a form of self-expression that binds society. Acts of love are performative and creative. You perform the acts of service, time, and touch. On the other hand, you creatively express through giving gifts and words. There is a sense of fulfillment in receiving validation from your partner (or "audience"). 

 Much like art, love helps us to connect to our audience given our imperfections. It makes life worth living!
"We read and write poetry because we are members of the human race. And the human race is filled with passion. And medicine, law, business, engineering, these are noble pursuits and necessary to sustain life. But poetry, beauty, romance, love, these are what we stay alive for." 
- Dead Poets Society movie

Why You Should Let Your Emotions Flow And Focus On The Solution

cannon-bard theory
Click the title to read more. Visit Ask Anna Page to find out how to ask!

Image Credits: pixabay.com

To say that the year 2019 ran by smoothly is completely false! It was one of the most challenging years of my personal and professional life. There were moments when I find myself crying in the corner and praying that things will get better. However, the closure of one issue is the birth of another. With the unending cycle of ups and downs, I learned how to adapt to different types of situations. 2019 has thought me some of the most valuable lessons that I hold dearly to this day. Despite its punches and blessings, I would not have it any other way!

 Emotional regulation was one of the priceless lessons I reaped from the past year. Emotions - we all have them - but can we control them? 

It Took Me Two Decades To Realize These

emotions

Click the title to read more. Visit Ask Anna Page to find out how to ask!
Image Credits: pixabay.com
Life is a journey of self-discovery. These past few months, I have noticed a significant slump on the road. Many seemingly minuscule and massive events made me realize how important it is to undergo a personal cleanse.

 No! I am not referring to the latest dietary cleanse or juice fast in the market (which I probably consider). I am referring to taking necessary actions to become a better version of myself. Actions needed to become a better daughter, a better friend, a better co-worker, a better partner, and a better person. 

 I turned to social support, spirituality, and Philosophy for guidance. A school of thought that shifted my mindset entirely is Stoicism. Stoicism highlights the division between what is happening to the world and how we emotionally respond to it. It is founded by Zeno, a wealthy merchant who had lost it all. In his despair, he turned to Philosophy for strength. 

How To Interact With Needy Individuals (Including Yourself)

conflicts
Click the title to read more. Visit Ask Anna Page to find out how to ask!

Image Credits: pixabay.com

Before we get down to business, I must define what neediness and being needy really is.

 Neediness is considered as a condition of indigence. People with low socioeconomic status feel this condition. On the other hand, a needy person is insecure and codependent. He or she usually uses tactics to gain approval, attention, or both. 

 As with everything, there are two sides of the story. There are those who deal with the needy individuals and those who deal with their emotional conflicts. Continue reading on to know more!

2016 COUNTDOWN: BEST MISS PSYCHOBABBLE ARTICLES OF THE YEAR

best of 2016
Please click the title to read the entire article. 

Image Credits: pixabay.com
Describing the Year 2016 as "surprising" is an understatement!

 Several significant events happened throughout the globe. Syrian War caused tremendous devastation especially to innocent young children. Reality star and business mogul Donald Trump won the United States presidential election. Renowned celebrities such as Prince, Carrie Fisher, and Alan Rickman passed away.

 I shall bring the lenses closer to home! An observable political shift swept the Philippines and the international authorities. We cannot predict what will happen next.

 Zooming in further will give you a glimpse of the holistic summation of my year. I reached potent milestones in my adult life. These achievements were made possible by using "goal setting". I will share more about its power in the succeeding article. 

Odd Is The New Normal: Why You Shall Accept Your Inner Weirdness

author's opinion

Please click the title to read the entire article. 
Image Credits: pixabay.com

"In nature, nothing is perfect and everything is perfect. Trees can be contorted, bent in weird ways, and they're still beautiful." ~ Poet Alice Walker

Whether you chew like you are eating robust nails or you cannot sleep without your smelly childhood pillow, we all have characteristics that make us extraordinary. I am not referring to the abnormal deviance from the norm! I am simply talking about the humble quirks that makes us special. I think there is nothing wrong with being "weird"! In fact, weirdness can be one of your powerful strengths.

Grief And Loss: 3 Ways To Positively Express Your Condolences

bereavement

Image Credits: pixabay.com
By: Suzie Kolber | Edited by: Anna Agoncillo

One of the most difficult things for a person to express is the feelings of empathy, sympathy, and condolences to someone who has lost a family member, a friend, a co-worker, or a significant someone.

Searching for the "right" words to say can be a serious struggle! This is why Suzie Kolber collated three tips to make this situation easier for both you and the person you want to comfort.

#1: BE GENUINE AND SINCERE.

It may not be intentional yet, you can come across as insecure when you say something that you do not mean. "I understand exactly how you feel!" is a prime example of this. 

Although you went through the similar situation, you cannot fully know how the other person actually feels. Everyone has a distinct personality and so are their emotions and actions. It is much better to say: "I cannot fully measure how you feel right now, but I am here for you."

Love And Attraction: Which Type Of Infidelity Will Anger You The Most?

attraction
Image Credits: pixabay.com

As overly dramatized by the media, the society clamors for a good story about public personalities who had messy affairs. This influenced the shift towards the acceptance of affairs. Nowadays, some people see affairs as an option for men or women to gain the excitement and intimacy that they otherwise lack in their dull marriages.

Book Review: 5 Greatest Things You'll Learn From Psychology Of Love, Money, & Life

book review

By: Anna Agoncillo
CLICK HERE FOR GOODREADS REVIEW AND FREE SAMPLE
You deserve to achieve understanding, awareness, and especially control over your life. Everyone does. And, "Psychology Of Love, Money, & Life" book might just be the answer!

 Aside from the "A Hack A Day – 5 ways to use psychology to your benefit" and "Simple Money Hacks To Improve Your Financial Life Now", here are the 5 greatest things you'll learn from the book...








There you go, a brief peek inside my #PLMLBook. It is available on Amazon (Kindle), Google Play Books, Apple Itunes, M1 Learning Centre, and Kobo.
Grab the copy with the price that suits you best! :)

Passion: How To Pursue What You Love In Work And Life

creativity

By: Anna Agoncillo
Image Credits: pixabay.com (CC0 Public Domain)
I had an interesting conversation with my sister the other day. It started casually with me asking her a simple question: "Are you willing to do everything in the pursuit of what you love?"

In no time, my teenage sister answered without hesitation: "I am willing to take the risks and take on new adventures in order to get what I love. It is because I want to do something that will make me happy." As a university student who majors in Management and Communication, she added: "It is the economics of life that states - higher risk is equal to higher return."

Flowers Can Improve Your Emotional Health And Other Areas Of Life In Just 5 Ways

benefits of flowers

By: Anna Agoncillo
Image Credits: Navdeep Raj via Flickr With Creative Commons License
Wonderfully diverse in colors, shapes, and sizes, flowers of all kind blossom to brighten up our days. Since the beginning of time, these beautiful creations had emerged as an evolutionary tool for pleasure, memory, and transcendence. Flowers are able to express a myriad of emotions from the declarations of love to the melodies of sympathy. It can even be used as a means of spiritual communication. The wide spectrum of positive and negative emotions that flowers are able to convey makes it the perfect gift.

 On that note, here are the 5 Ways Flowers Can Improve Your Emotional Health And Other Areas Of Life: 

 1. ITS MERE PRESENCE BOOSTS HAPPINESS

 A group of researchers from Rutgers University, New Jersey found that the mere presence of flowers immediately boosted the participants' happiness levels. All of them, regardless of their ages, had universal and genuine smiles across their faces. Indeed gorgeous blooms can trigger happy emotions. 

ASK ANNA #7: How To Overcome Fear In The 21st Century

advice
Visit Ask Anna Page to find out how to ask!
Image Credits: Pascal via Flickr
Anonymous asks…

 Why do we fear? How do you conquer it? 

 Anna says…

Fear is an unpleasant emotion and a vital response to physical and emotional perception of danger. Aside from its cognitive aspects, fear also has an evolutionary root that helps us to survive. If we do not have the capability to be fearful and take tremendous risks then, we could have not survived for long.

The Ripple Effect: Everything Is Interconnected

by anna agoncillo

By: Anna Agoncillo and Michael Cahapay | michaelcahapay.blogspot.com

Image Credits: Khairul Nizam via Flickr
Everything is interconnected. Every little thing you do can influence someone else's life.  As cliché as this may sound, these statements speak volumes of circumstantial truth.

Picture a person throwing a piece of stone into the river full of small fishes. He will then see a splash creating circles rippling out from the point where the stone hit the water. This thrown stone (although it might be small in nature), might have significant effects such as scaring the nearby school of fish or hitting another rock along the way.

Positive Psychology: 6 Ways to Live a Healthier and Happier Life.

by anna agoncillo

By: Anna Agoncillo | First Seen on: SGPsychStuff

One of the common New Year's Resolution is to be happier and to live healthier.

 Instead on focusing on what is wrong with you, Positive Psychology helps you to celebrate what is going right and improves that even more. It highlights your strengths and use it to your advantage.

 Following its principles, here are 6 Ways you can lead a Healthier and Happier Life...

1. Know and live by your values.
© IMGUR
Authentic values (e.g. curiosity, bravery, loyalty, forgiveness, persistence, kindness, leadership, and humor) are very important because these are in lined with your behavior. Identifying your core values will direct you to your personal strengths (Peterson, 2006).

Learning and Positive Reinforcement: You can be tamed!

b.f. skinner
By: Anna Agoncillo
© Izquotes
Even I agree that sometimes you have to break the rules to have fun. Living in the fast lane or beating the red light with the breeze of cool air in your face as you cruise with your friends in the road may give you the exhilarating feeling!
But, like wild animals, your beast side can be tamed...with a little thing called positive reinforcement.
© Bored Panda
Operant Conditioning by B.F. Skinner

 The central component of operant conditioning is reinforcement. Operant conditioning is learning in which a behavior is strengthened or weakened depending on the consequences (i.e. favorable or unfavorable) (Feldman, 2011).

Loss, Grief, and Coping: Rest in Paradise

annie agoncillo
By: Anna Agoncillo
They say that first cut is the deepest, but the second one feels as deep. My grandfather died last year, and now my grandmother who was battling Lung Cancer is gone.

Theoretical Basis of Bereavement

You might be familiar with the Kübler-Ross's 5 stages of grief. According to this model, we go through different stages during our bereavement namely: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance (Santrock, 2007). Although there are specific stages, the sequence is not fixed (Axelrod, 2006). Nonetheless, the end result is peaceful acceptance.

On the other hand, George Bonanno argues that there are no stages to go through because of our natural reaction to grief, called resilience (Bonanno, 2004).
Hold on! She's on her way to Paradise.

They say that first cut is the deepest, but the second one feels as deep. My grandfather died last year, and now my grandmother who was battling Lung Cancer is gone.

At first, I was in denial. When my mom told me about my grandmother’s passing, I didn’t even cry. I just told her to be strong and that I’m glad that she’s in a better place now. But, I felt the heaviness in my chest.

I thought I was emotionally strong because I was mentally prepared for the worst. You see, the doctors had given her 4 days to live.

As I was telling my friends about the big news, my tears rushed down. It’s reality hitting me in the head. She’s gone. I can no longer taste the food she cooks, nor can I hear her say she loves me.

Like MP on Facebook