ASK ANNA #8: Handling Self-Loathing And Emptiness

March 15, 2017

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Feline asks...

Lately, I feel like I'm useless and I can't do anything right. Sometimes, I'm very sensitive and I'm very ashamed because I think everyone thinks I do not do anything good. I kind of hate myself.

Additionally, I've seen my parents argue in front of me because of my father's infidelity and I start to feel empty and lacks to do anything. It also seems like i can't feel extreme emotions anymore. I just feel empty.

Can you help me? And thank you in advance.

Anna says...

I understand the weight of your situation right now. Your father's infidelity and their marital woes can affect your attitudes toward love and relationship. It may even impact your ability to trust others. In this difficult time, I recommend that you reach out to others for emotional support. Assistance from people who understand what you are going through (e.g., school therapist or friend with the same situation) can help you to deal with it healthily. How old where you when this infidelity occurred?

Let us move on to the symptoms that you have been experiencing. It sounds to me that what you are describing are present with someone who has depression. I cannot confirm that fully as I do not know how long you have been experiencing this. Anyway, these are the symptoms of depression:

–       Fatigue
–       Recurring thoughts of self-harm and death
–       Low energy or mood
–       Uncontrollable bouts of crying
–       Excessive sleep or loss of sleep
–       Loss of appetite
–       Sudden weight loss or weight gain
–       Loss of interest or pleasure in all or most activities once deemed pleasurable
–       Inability to function in daily living activities
–       Inability to meet social or work commitments
–       Poor concentration or memory
–       Irritability, agitation or psycho-motor retardation noticed by others
–       Feelings of guilt and anger
–       Self-loathing
–       Feelings of helplessness and hopelessness

Learn to recognize whether these symptoms apply to you. Ways to cope are available at: Know Depression, No Stigma.

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If you experience the overwhelming signs of depression (i.e., reckless behavior and suicidal thoughts), please seek help immediately.
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